I wanted to take this time to thank everyone for all their support and kind words. I was hesitant to share my story. But I feel now that it was the best thing for me to do. I have met so many wonderful people and have felt such an overwhelming feeling of love. That there is no way but,to feel lifted in my time of waiting. I wait to speak to my doctors. I wait to hear their words. I wait to see what new medications I will be on. After speaking to a friend today. We were discussing how a diagnosis changes your life and your path. I mean I have been sick for the longest. But, you always wish to feel better. You always hope they will find what is wrong with you and make all the pain go away. But when you get that final diagnosis and you hear that you will be like this for the rest of your life. You realize now that things will have to change. You will not be that person you once were and was hoping to be again. Activities change and your goals. See, I have always struggled with work and home. But hoped to one day be like I always say "normal". But now I see that I will have to work around these illnesses. I won't let it stop me. I will try not to let it bring me down. But darn it is so hard at times. The Rheumatoid is catching up to me. As even to type these days hurts so bad. It scares someone like me that loves to cook and craft and write. To know that at some point I may not be able to do some or any. I battle a constant nausea and when I say it is one of the worst feelings. I just couldn't even describe how bad it gets. I tell myself if they could fix this or that I may be able to handle more. But then that little voice says " what if they can't"?
All I can do now is think positive. Take in all the love I have surrounding me and enjoy life with the hand that I was dealt!
I thank you all for following along and be as supportive as you have been.
Don't give up on me because I will be back even if it hurts!
As for right now I am in still in recovery as some things after surgery did not go as planned. But just some bumps in the road is all.